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Homeschool Socialization Is Superior to Public School Socialization

When homeschoolers talk about homeschool socialization, they start defending homeschooling and trying to say it’s just as good as the public schools.  

I believe that homeschooling socialization is so far superior to the public schools version that it’s no contest. In fact, they need to adopt our ideas to fix their messed up version of socialization.

When I speak of socialization I mean the ability to interact in a healthy way with people of diverse ages and beliefs.

There’s no contest: homeschooling socialization is better hands down.

We shouldn’t be defending our position and justifying ourselves to our opponents. We should be demanding that they defend their position, because the public school proponents have no viable defence in this argument.

Prove to me that the public schools version of socialization is either healthy or ideal.

You can’t.

It is neither.

Anyone who looks rationally and logically at the public school’s version of socialization can see that it’s unhealthy –dare I say even dangerous.

That’s really not up for debate.

Anyone who can’t see that is simply choosing to not face reality.

Here’s a dose of reality: metal detectors, school shootings, bully-induced suicides, teachers who are child predators –not to mention the issues that are considered normal like cliques, age discrimination and rebellion against authority.

All of these are real issues.

And all of these are connected to the socialization of the public schools.

Homeschooling holds the key to healthy socialization.

Homeschooling actually offers a superior form of socialization for a few reasons:

1) The best way for kids to learn to function in society is not for them to be in a classroom for eight hours a day with kids their age. What kids learn from being around kids their own age almost exclusively is that older kids are to be mocked, younger kids are to be despised, and only the kids who are the same age are cool. Oh, and adults are idiots except a few teachers who are cool. It’s basically prejudices based on age. They don’t learn to interact in healthy way with people of multiple backgrounds and ages. There is only so much that public school teachers can do to alter the effects of this environment. Good teachers do their best to alter this environment but it is the environment that is the issue.

2) Homeschooling is apprenticing a child in adult behavior. Because they’re with adults all day long in real life situations, they learning healthy behavior. If you want a 14 year old boy to learn to be an adult you surround him by adults in the same way you apprentice someone in a trade or disciple someone. This is a classic, long-recognised method of education going back not just hundreds but thousands of years. This is the way that Jesus trained his disciples. This is the way that many careers and trades were passed down to the next generation. This is a tried and true method of education. How anyone could call its validity into question is beyond me. Anyone who has studied history knows that this method works.

3) The public schools actually breed antisocial behavior so they’re not the paradigm that we should be striving for but rather part of a problem that needs correcting.  The problems in the public school system are vast. I’m not interested in climbing on board a sinking ship. The public school is a sinking ship. If we don’t want our proverbial ship to sink, we’re going to have to do things differently from how the public schools do them. Here’s a youtube video that talks about this more.

4) Neither homeschooling nor any form of education produces awkward children, but children who are awkward (due to personality or disorder) are safe to be themselves in a homeschool environment which is certainly not true of a public school environment. The public school is a dangerous environment for children who cannot conform to the norms expected because they will be mistreated by those who have learned antisocial behavior in the public schools. This is why so many parents of special needs children decide to homeschool.

The argument against homeschool socialization is not accurate or even logical.

Homeschooling is a safer environment emotionally and psychologically — for “normal” and children with mental health disorders.  

The socialization argument is a lie.

Someone made up the homeschool-socialization lie to try to make homeschool parents believe that they were doing an inferior job and to scare potential homeschool parents into keeping their kids in the public school system.

There’s no data that supports it.

The data actually supports the opposite: that the public school environment is cultivating unhealthy social behavior.

It doesn’t even take data to see that.  

Anyone who can take a step back and view the public schools objectively can see this truth.

If they’re willing to look.

I’m not going to just defend homeschooling.

I’m going on the offensive:  I’m going to be honest about the problems in the public school which public school supporters seem to willingly ignore.

When people ask me about socialization, I am polite but honest: “It’s a myth. It’s a lie created to scare people that has no basis in data and is not reflected in the lives of homeschool graduates.”

I know hundred –yes hundreds– of homeschool graduates including my husband and I.

Most of us would never be pegged as homeschoolers.

I’ve been told, “You were homeschooled?! But you’re so nice.” And “Really, your parents homeschooled you? But you are so conversational!”

This myth, this lie, is so prevalent that even many homeschoolers believe it.

They actively strive to get their kids into public-school-like settings to get their socialization.

The problem is that they’re borrowing trouble. The public schools version of socialization is broken. It’s part of the broken system that we should be cautious about.

While having a classroom itself doesn’t equal an unhealthy environment it can easily become unhealthy if we’re not diligent to make sure that bullying, cliques, age discrimination, rebellion against authority, and other antisocial behaviors don’t creep in.

Don’t believe the lies.

If you repeat a lie long enough people start to believe it. 

That’s what happened with the lie of socialization.


Sarah Forbes

I talked about apprenticeship and how it applies to homeschooling in this post as well. 


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